Wanting pleasure and withdrawing from pain are natural reflexes, but when we identify strongly with ours desires or fears, we lose sight of the totality of who and what we are. Instead of experiencing our full radiance and power, we experience only a fraction of our natural being– the tiny piece that feels alone, afraid, insecure, and incomplete.

Which of the judgements below are keeping you small?

Choose at least 1 judgement and question if it is objectively 100% true. If it is true, how do you know? Is any alternative view possible? If so, list the alternatives.

Mental/Emotional Judgements

  • I feel bad when I feel anxious or depressed.
  • I feel it is not ok to show anger or to cry, especially in front of others.
  • I am critical of myself for having negative thoughts.
  • I judge myself for not being intelligent, humorous, or confident enough.
  • I get upset with myself when I am impatient or irritable with loved ones.
  • I am a bad mediator because my mind is so busy.


Body Judgements

  • I desperately want to lose or gain weight, to lose fat or gain muscle.
  • I obsess over what to eat or what not to eat.
  • I am uneasy with how my body is aging.
  • I don't feel attractive enough.
  • I blame myself when I have low energy or get sick.
  • I wish my skin or hair looked different.

Character Judgements

  • I feel selfish for not always putting others first.
  • I feel guilty about past actions.
  • I judge myself harshly when I eat, drink, or smoke too much.
  • I feel that others don't get me, that I am always falling short socially and romantically and am destined to be alone.
  • I am upset with myself for not achieving enough by this age.
  • I am not comfortable making mistakes. It does not feel ok to be vulnerable and insecure.

Love/Relationship Judgements

  • If I only found the right person, then I would be happy.
  • I wish I could love myself more.
  • I feel bad being single…I wish I wasn't.
  • I feel bad about being divorced…I wish I wasn't.
  • I am a bad spouse/a bad parent.
  • I will never find love again.