9 thoughts on “Day 20 – FORGIVING”
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Day 20 – FORGIVING
Today, letโs dig into the peace of what forgiveness really is by letting go of what it isn't.
Today, letโs dig into the peace of what forgiveness really is by letting go of what it isn't.
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Katie, I love what you wrote. You hit it right on the nose. As a child I was abused by my mother, and I grew up and married the male figure of my mother. For some reason it was easy to forgive my mom, but not my ex husband. Looking back she shouldโve been the one that was harder to forgive because sheโs the one that set the ball in motion for my future relationships. I think the thing that helped me forgive my ex husband was time.
For a long time I held resentment And anger and wanted to scratch his eyes out. I had to pray daily for all the things in life that I wanted for myself, be given to him. I also had to come to terms that they both were sick people who were doing what they were taught.
I had to do a lot of counseling and domestic violence classes to overcome, and sometimes still struggle, but forgiveness is there.
I have a tendency to hold long grudges against loved ones if I feel betrayed or hurt by what they did or said. I feel hostile, angry, but also sick. I feel like my soul is being eaten away slowly but I canโt help myself. I donโt know if when I do reconcile with my loved ones, if Iโve truly forgiven them but those feelings are g really there anymore. Iโm trying to not let it get to the point where I feel hurt and betrayed because I donโt want to feel like my soul is dying. Iโm also trying to learn not to take things so personal and itโs a long journey.
When I hold onto the negativity it only damages me and the people that are around me. By forgiving people and myself it gives me peace and allows me to move on to happier moments and to create a more positive energy around me.
While forgiveness might be somewhat egotistical, I still think its important, especially if you are in the place where you are holding onto something against someone else. For me personally, the only thing that holding on to the negative emotions actually does is bring me down. Similarly, when I am angry and resentful towards someone, the only person it seems to have any long term effects on is also me. It’s so important to me to let these things go. Put myself in the other persons shoes, think about why they might be acting the way that they are, doing things the way that they do. Try to approach it from a compassionate place of love so that ultimately I can get to a point of forgiveness which is so much more healing.
forgiveness can save marriages and families from destruction. Not everything is forgivable that happens to us, but we need to be open to the idea of forgiving the other person.
Freedom
In the words of Aunt May, “Revenge is like a poison, flowing through our veins, distorting our minds, until finally, it turns us into something ugly.” Selfish or not, I think forgiveness in the fullness of time, is an essential part of our mental health.
I definitely believe that not letting go and forgiving creates anger, bitterness, and resentment. I have felt it in my own life! And these feelings that we hold on to effect how we interact with others. Our attitudes are different. We can become short tempered and mean. Glib. And most people choose to not associate with people who only ever seem to be mad at them. At least, I do. Because it causes me stress then too! If we let things go, forgive, it gives us a chance to free ourselves from those potentially caustic feelings. We can move forward with a lightness and a sunnier outlook on life.
Acting from a space of forgiveness seems to rid unnecessary baggage that limits connection to my effortless, peaceful self. In turn, others who I interact with the same and together, we are helping push humanity forward.