Today, put your “not enough” radar on and collect insecure statements
Notice if one of them pops into your own head.
Notice if your best friend says she needs to lose weight.
Notice if your sibling says how frustrated they are because they aren't where they want to be in their career yet.
How many “not enough” statements can you catch today within yourself and your social circle? Keep a tally somewhere.
We often think our problems are special in some way, that it is only us who don't belong. That we “are doing life wrong” because we are broken or flawed in a way others are not. No wonder so many of us feel alone, anxious, and on the verge of hopelessness!
I invite you to truly consider that the bad feelings you have about yourself are actually not unique to you.
That feeling deficient or not enough is actually a very common human experience, reinforced by culture, the media, and even by parents, friends, loved ones, and colleagues.
The joke is on us!
We are all running around with the assumption that we are not good enough as we are. So we disconnect from each other, compete with each other, and treat each other pretty badly as a result.
Here is the thing, no human being on this planet whether it is a parent, an ex, or a respected teacher has an ultimate, objective say on your worth as a person or your capacity for happiness and love and you don't have a say about theirs either!
Everyone in your life is also just a person with their own hangups and insecurities (even if they won't admit it). No matter how much another person tries to be better or more superior to you, at the end of the day whether someone is better or worse than you is a construct. It's made up! Remember, a construct is an idea, a thought, and thought is not absolute truth.
A thought is only ever an interpretation.
Just because a bunch of people believes something to be true, doesn't make it so. History has proven this time and time again. Everybody knew the earth was flat. Everybody knew the earth was the center of the universe.
And these days everybody “knows” that we need to fix and improve ourselves, strive for external achievements, and change the people around us, in order to feel love and happiness.