Creating a Positivity Bias to End Negative Thoughts

By Laura Thomas
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Laura is a writer, performer, mindfulness instructor, yoga teacher, entrepreneur, and some days, a fairy princess. After the tragic loss of her older brother in 2011, Laura decided the one guideline she’d use to orient the rest of her life was this: Life is short. Only do things that make the world a more compassionate place.
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Connie
Connie

George Lackoff, an American cognitive linguist, best known for his thesis that lives of individuals are significantly influenced by the central metaphors they use to explain complex phenomena. “Ideas don’t float in the air, they live in your neuro-circuitry,” Lakoff says. Each time ideas in our neural circuits are activated, they get stronger. And over time, complexes of neural circuits create a frame through which we view the world. “The problem is, that frame is unconscious,” Lakoff says. “You aren’t aware of it because you don’t have access to your neural circuits.” So what happens when you hear facts that don’t fit in your worldview is that you can’t process them: you might ignore them, or reject or attack them, or literally not hear them. It is important to try to think about why you feel a certain way and adjust your frame.

Christi
Christi

I too lost my brother a long time ago and without knowing what I was doing , started practicing positivity. I am social worker by trade so that helps, especially working with youth. I am now applying positivity to my own aging process and it is wonderful. One thing I add to this list is to tell someone something about them that is wonderful, compliment someone else. We have been taught that this makes us feel less than , but in truth , the opposite is true. I have turned many an enemy to a friend with this positive practice. I feel empowered when I do this . I have helped someone else feel better.

Courtney Carter
Courtney Carter

My question is… How can change those negative thoughts​ when it doesn’t have another to do with another person but it’s towards yourself. Like for example whenever​ I don’t hear from a person for a week, it’s like my brain starts coming up with all types of scenario’ of why that person hasn’t called or texted you. In my head I would say well maybe their busy and can’t talk at the moment or it would get worse like I’ll think that maybe their talking to someone else because all you talk about is negative things and you just draining them when all they want is to hear about is something positive. You’re stupid for being so negative, you suck the life out of people that’s why they don’t call or text you because you’re so negative. I punish myself because I was punished for every thing going wrong when I was growing up and so now that I’m all grown-up it’s like how do I break away from that mindset?

Crystal St. Pierre
Crystal St. Pierre

Thank you so much Laura for this AMAZING article. I work for a social services non profit and they have helped me to retrain my thinking from “What is wrong with that person?” to “What has happened to that person to make them act, make a decision, etc?” It helps to shift the paradigm and realize that we are humans going through life and we need to be more compassionate to ourselves and to each other. Trauma informed care is what we call it.

Xoxo
Crystal

Deb
Deb

I have a negative co-worker that i spend too much of my time at work allowing her to bring me down alongside of her by my reactions. Thanks for the reminders and insight, I’ll try to put some to use to have a more positive day!

Patty kent
Patty kent

Thank you for the reminder. Reading something uplifting each and every day helps me stay in that mindful place.

Chrystal
Chrystal

A good read for the start of my day. Thank you

Mistyna
Mistyna

Thank you! This is very well written and tremendously helpful. Everyone should read this!

Carol Boston
Carol Boston

This was perfect for me right now.

Thanks.

Hanan
Hanan

I enjoyed reading your article .. it’s really amazing 🙂
I am so gonna share it with friends and family
thank you

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